The Mammalian Series

While I believe my most important work are dolls like Tug Christ and my Max Ernst series, I do create a number of dolls for children because they are easy to sell to toy stores. This is my Mammalian Series. I don't necessarily do animals so much as I make dolls that have mammalian qualities - soft, boggy, milky, toothing.

These are dolls with dolls inside them and with a glass shard inside the inside-doll. Parents must remove the glass-shard before giving the toy to the child. I am not responsible for what a four year old may do to his or her own anatomy or the eyes of a friend with this shard, for these shards I gather in the street after a home game and they are terribly infected.

Fortunately only very rich people can afford to buy my mammalian toys, and these are the kinds of people who can afford to have maids look over their children. Sometimes a maid intentionally leaves the shard in the doll and a legal battle ensues. However, my packages clearly say: Remove the glass shard from the inside-animal before giving to child. Thus I am not legally responsible. Usually it's the maid that's responsible and usually she's fired for neglience.

I secretly think that the maids who leave the shard in the inside-animal secretly want to torture the eye out of their little prince anyway and my toy gives them the opportunity to do so without being put in jail.

I also have a series for poor children. I mass produce this series in a sweathshop in Asia. It's called The Truth. It's very popular among college students and other such mayhem.

I want to give one of the Mammalian dolls to Alicia and not tell her about the shard.